.png){kind=small}
“When we approach suffering together, when we choose not to hide from it, our lives don’t diminish, they expand”
After Lucy Kalanithi’s husband, Paul, was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer, they knew everything was going to be okay; they just didn’t know what “everything” was going to be.
Paul was finishing his training as a neurosurgeon when he started to feel ill. He lost a lot of weight, developed back pains and a really bad cough. When he went to get it checked out, they discovered that he had tumors in his lungs and bones. He was able to live for 22 more months. During this time, he wrote a memoir about facing mortality and he and Lucy gave birth to their daughter, Cady. In his memoir, he talks about the fact that he was at crossed roads, he treated so many patients he thought he could treat himself, instead, he saw “a harsh, vacant, gleaming white desert. As if a sandstorm had erased all familiarity”. Even though he had treated other patients and learned about their experiences with different kinds of illnesses, he had to learn to accept his own. He knew he was going to die, and he needed to understand what made his life worth living. After he finished his memoir, he told Lucy that he was ready to die and Lucy agreed because she could tell that he completed his journey. Nine hours later he died.
Some people want to know when they will die, others rather leave it a mystery. Whether you want to know or not, information like this helps with any future decisions. It can help you be prepared for what is coming and can help you move on afterwards. Even if you feel that there is only one answer, you should remember that you always have a choice. Lucy asks what others would do if you “would want to be on life support if it offered any chance of a longer life”. Both choices require a great deal of thought but it’s our own choice. The answer just depends on what type of care will help you live your life the way you want to.
Watch the full talk here!
Comentários